Monday, June 11, 2012

Feed Me, If You Dare


After months of painstaking scientific research and countless hours in front of the mirror, I have finally perfected the "Yes I'm ready for that spoonful of food, but really I harbor hidden, darker intentions of spiting it in your face immediately afterwards" look. Patent pending.

An Evening With An Old Chum


My old comrade in arms Ben (along with his supervisors Skye and Steve) paid me a visit. I couldn't help but show off my newly built armada with a sail to the mystic Isle of Bainbridge, upon my flagship "The Sea Monkey."


Many laughs were had upon the high seas.


And a few bawdy mariner songs as well! Chip chip, cheerio good mate!

Well Someone Had to Chaperon


And it was a good thing too - they kept trying to sneak off in the woods whenever my royal mounted carriage turned away.  Kids these days.

One Day, All This Shall Be Mine!



Ho Ho, a fine jest I know. It already is mine, and something will have to be done about that pointy building the Red Buffoon seems to be trying to stick me upon.


As always, doing my part to make this city look deliriously good.

Saturday, March 10, 2012

A well-earned vacation

 As you can see, I spent my post-Tibetan retreat lounging by the pool in sunny Palm Springs (because even a Monkey needs to catch a few rays from time-to-time).

 The Red Buffoon forced me into the chilly blue waters of the swimming pool, where to no one's surprise I excelled at aquatic sports - particularly the backstroke.

 And of course I forced him to be my mount for a rousing match of water polo.

 Ah, a fair maiden accosted me at poolside! The lovely Gigi and I became fast friends...

Oh behave my dreamy damsel. They say that to kiss the Mongolian Monkey is to experience the sweetness of the honey comb, the the subtleness of the hummingbird's sneeze, and the electricity of the lightning bolt, all in one. You were warned!

Alas, they never stop flocking to my handsome side.

Rejoice - I have returned

Greetings, the long-awaited return of I, your favorite Mongolian primate is here. My six week silent retreat in the mountains of Eastern Tibet were filled with enlightenment, inner-growth, and deliciously spiced goat meat. And now I return to you, a wiser monkey, ready to fulfill the prophecies that were foretold of my world dominance and staggering good looks...

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Fear Me Beasts Of The Wild!!!


My first big game hunt was a smashing success. I snared this unsuspecting giraffe in a basket I wove from dried banana leaves whilst gathered round a fire, listening to the creation stories of the Hunka-Pupu Bush Tribe people (in their native language). Giraffe jerky for all!

Friday, January 20, 2012

One Day, They Shall Pay (part 2)

Tis I, the Mongolian Snow Monkey! As you can see, Mother and the Buffoon stuffed me into some sort of eskimo suit and then risked my very life by forcing me to slide around on a strange plastic contraption. Their shame knows no bounds!
Seriously friends, why has no one called Child Protective Services yet?